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One Day Mama….

01/21/2015 - Author: Jennifer

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I have been working part-time outside of the home for over a year now. I have to say, it has been great for our family. We have benefited greatly from this. I did gain a lot more of something since working -perspective- and I needed it.

Motherhood is messy. Being a boymom is messy. (I am not saying that having girls do not come with messes, but I can only speak as a boymom. Girl moms, I applaud you for your survival skills and keeping your sanity).  I embrace the mess. I really do try. Yes, there comes a time when I just can’t stand it anymore and we need to clean, but I try not to exasperate me. I try not to get frustrated when I am asked to do something again or when my son asks for my help. Why? One day, the mess will be cleaned up. One day, the questions for help will stop coming (or not come as frequently). Our conversations are going to change through the years and get harder. One day, if he meets “the girl”, I will be replaced.

The super-hero pajama’s will be no more. He will not need to be rocked to sleep anymore. Baking will go quicker because there will be less mess to clean and nobody to help you or teach so you won’t be slowed down. Just breath and try to take mental pictures. Laugh when icing gets on you and flour is all over his shirt.

The legos will no longer be stepped on and nobody will scare you with snake noises. The towers that are being built just to be torn down will no longer be. Nobody will try to gross me out or scare me (because the more disgusting and the scarier mommy thinks it is, the better). That season will come to an end sooner than I want, so I am trying to live it as much as I can with as much enjoyment as I can. My schedule will no longer be broken up by school and other activities. I will one day have a little more free time, but I will need to know what to do with it.

Karen Kingsbury has the best book on this perspective called Let Me Hold You Longer. I encourage you to read it.

I am not saying that we shouldn’t teach our kids responsibilities. They need to function without us. I am also not saying to make your kids the center of your world and life existance.  I am saying (and I say this to myself) to breath, be patient, and try to find the good in it all. Let’s have more fun with this awesome privilege we call motherhood. One day mama, it will be gone.

Be blessed 🙂

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Prayed for Future Husband, Praying for Now Husband

01/12/2015 - Author: Jennifer

Screenshot 2015-01-12 22.57.09Ladies, I know I am not alone. We are told from a young age to pray for your future husbands. We are told to make a list and tell God (basically recite it). Now, I am not saying to not tell God what you think you want. I did it. It sounded so spiritual and Scriptural (Psalm 37:4 anyone)? This was easy for me. (I don’t remember praying for my role as a wife very often, oddly enough). Now that I have been married for a dozen years, I have been humbled by a real lesson:

Pray for future husband=easy. Praying for the man I married and for my marriage=hard.

Not that I have never prayed for my husband or marriage–I have intermittently. They have ranged from blissful lovey-dovey (thank you God for my marriage), asking for God’s favor (please bless this marriage), to desperate (God save my marriage!).

I have asked God a couple of questions when I have prayed:

  • God who is THIS man?
  • Why did THIS happen?
  • Why did I marry him? (I will say that I feel the advice to remember why you got married in the 1st place feels ill-advised when I am going thru a hard season. People change and if he isn’t the same man anymore, I need a new reason).
  • WHO am I? I don’t remember anymore.

I have also been bossy and told God what to do (He is God. He can handle my bossiness):

  • Since You allowed this to happen, help me!
  • My husband does not meet my list/needs/wants that I prayed for or meets my expectations. Open his eyes.
  • He doesn’t get me anymore. Please tell him what I need since me talking is not working.

Why is it hard to pray for my husband? Why do I not devote sometime EVERYDAY to praying for someone that I made a covenant with and promised to forsake everyone else? I have a list of excuses:

  • Facing an unknown diagnosis/future for our son
  • Selfishness
  • Pride
  • Feeling defeated
  • Doubt
  • Life gets in the way. (Social commitments, church, family, etc.).
  • Health issues
  • Family issues (mine and his).

In all fairness, I do also fail to to consistently pray for me. I am a work in progress. I have no excuses.

I type this for a couple of reasons.

  1. I want to be honest and say that praying for my marriage is something I struggle with and I hope that I am not alone.
  2. Go ahead and tell God what you want, but you might be surprised. I married a man completely opposite of what I thought I wanted and honestly needed. Yes, I know saying needed will offend people, but I am just trying to live and learn where He leads and marriage is one of the ways He is refining me. I am trying to go with it.
  3. I can not give up! I can’t give up on this marriage when I don’t get my way or when times are hard.
  4. The Bible says to not stop praying. (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18).

Wives are you with me? Let’s commit not making any more excuses and be consistent in praying for the most important relationship here on earth?

Be blessed 🙂

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